Saturday 29 June 2019

Immi's army prayer challenge starts today.

Today we start the week of prayer and fasting for Immi. I have attached the seizure diary for this month and would ask you to pray for a significant diminishing of seizure activity which would lead to the scans being clear when she has the pre-op MRI in the Autumn.

If you are joining us please do drop me a line to let me know - it’s such an encouragement to know others are praying and fasting for her.
If you are in the Penzance area and would like to join us next Sat (6th July) for prayer, worship and breaking fast then please get in touch we would love to see you.
Lots of people have asked how they should fast. It’s entirely between you and God, how you fast, some are fasting certain meals, or certain types of food, or a whole fast on certain days. This is about a heart conviction, not something prescribed to you, so please pray and do what is laid on your heart. (I wrote some more on this in my last post ‘The Challenge’ www.purposepassionreason.blogspot.com so do have a look there).
I will keep you posted through the week. And thank you from the bottom of our hearts.

Friday 7 June 2019

Shout out to the siblings...

This post is dedicated solely to my son and to all the siblings that grow up with brothers and sisters who have special needs.   I’m not going to name him (as he is 16 and that would embarrass him) but I want to give a huge great shout out to him. 
Immi’s brother has seen her go from a normal little sister that he spent time with a played with and got into adventures with when they were little to a sister that he (unconsciously I think) started to protect. He has picked her out of pools when she has seized, he has caught her when falling, he has called on us when she was seizing, he consistently takes the dog out, feeds him, walks him, does the poop thing, empties the dishwasher,  vacuums and manages his homework without nagging (although he is very glad he never has to do French again now!) He has held a part time job since he was 14, today was the first time he has ever asked for a lift to school (it was lashing and he had 2 GCSEs) and has always got himself there, he has found his own spiritual home at Discovery Church and gets up and goes without us nagging, he holds his tongue and his fists when Immi lashes out at him and he (in the main) has compassion upon her.  
I think he often feels unseen. He doesn’t say it, but he quietly gets on with things. When we try to give attention there is always another voice, another demand and he just knuckles down and gets on. He finishes GCSEs next Friday and therefore his secondary school (sixth form college in Sept). And I just want to say here, publically. 

I am so proud of him. I don’t care what results day holds, because sensitivity, compassion, care, responsibility aren’t things that can be taught and graded.  Selflessness can’t be learned it is something that we are. And I admire these things in him.   I can’t say it’s down to amazing parenting, we have done what we all do, we have tried our best but we have failed in many ways and I wish many things had been different but I am thankful.

In Daniel 6, Daniel is described as having an excellent spirit. This Hebrew word can also be translated as extraordinary or surpassing. And this is my prayer for him; that he will continue to obtain and retain the excellent spirit he has now. 

....And if you read this my son, I’m sorry for embarrassing you (but only a tiny bit!) xx


Sunday 2 June 2019

Even if.... The Challenge

This story starts about a week ago.  For those of you who follow this blog, you will know that our daughter received a diagnosis for all the seizures, hemiplegia and cognitive delay she has had which began when she was 4 years old.  This is not a hopeful diagnosis; Rasmussen’s Encephalitis is a progressive, degenerative disease which affects 1.7 in every 10 million, so it's pretty rare!  The doctors are unanimous in saying they need to do a left hemispherotomy in order to stop the slow spread of degeneration through the brain.

I was knocked for six.  I pretty much had all the hope and faith knocked out of me, but I had a little phrase going around my head, that said ‘Even if…, even if….’ I kind of ignored it as I knew where it came from and I wasn’t really ready to engage.  

This little phrase being whispered into my soul is a phrase uttered by 3 friends long ago.  These three friends were living in exile, their country had been taken over by a foreign power and this foreign power was trying to exert its power and authority over God’s people.  The three friends; Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego refused to bow to this authority and when a gold statue was set up and everyone was told to bow down and worship it when the music played, they refused.  There was  lovely incentive to do this, and Nebuchadnezzar was obviously a stick kind of guy rather than a carrot chap as there was ‘furnace of blazing fire’ immediately waiting for anyone who refused to ‘fall down and worship’.  Worship of gods is often done prostrate and so a call to fall down is not unusual but how easy to spot those not taking part eh? You show whether you are in or out with your body, so if you refuse to fall down then you are taking a stand. We are told that all the peoples of every language worshipped – fear is powerful here. But Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego did not.



So, inevitably, Shadrach, Meschach and Abed-nego are seen refusing to bow, are reported to the king and hauled in front of him.  He again tried to exert his authority with threat.  He ‘graciously’ gives them another chance to bow down and worship reminds them of the furnace and just as Eve was asked a question in the garden at the beginning of time ‘Did God really say….’ The king asks a question ‘What god is there who can rescue you out of my hands?’  I’m not sure Nebuchadnezzar was really expecting an answer, I think he was expecting this to be a rhetorical question, but the three friends acknowledge the question and tell him its irrelevant,  They go on to tell him that the God of Israel is able to rescue, but that EVEN IF He does not, that they would still be faithful and worship him, not Nebuchadnezzar and his gods.
At this point Nebuchadnezzar lost his ‘nice guy’ image – I’m not sure he ever had one, but the Bible tells us his facial expression changed and that he was filled with fury, I guess he wasn’t used to having people refuse him! He heated the furnace to seven times hotter and had Shadrach, Meschach and Abed-nego tied up.  When they were thrown in the fire was so hot it killed the men who had carried them.  But as they looked suddenly Nebuchadnezzar got a reply to his earlier question.  He saw four men walking about and exclaimed that the fourth one looked like a son of God or the Gods.  The word he uses is a plural word elohim literally meaning ‘a heathen god’ which for him at this point meant the God of Israel.  Suddenly Nebuchadnezzar changes his tune and he calls out the three calling them ‘servants of the most high God’.  He sees that the fire had no effect on them, no singing, no scorching, not even the smell and he recognises the power in the God of Israel, responding in the only way he knows how  - by decreeing safety for all who worship him and death and destruction for anyone speaking against Him and then he sums it all up by saying ‘for there is no other god who is able to save this way.’  


This is the story that had been nudging its way into my brain and I had been doing quite a good job of ignoring it until I picked up a group of friends in a minibus and drove to Leeds to attend a conference ‘Cherish 2019’ with 8000 others.  On the way I was driving and unbeknown to me my friend in the back sent me a message the first part read ‘There’s another in the fire standing next to you, should you ever need reminding, that’s where he’ll be.’

I didn’t get the message until we had arrived at the conference.  I briefly glanced at the message and thought ‘aww that’s lovely’ but to be honest (sorry Rachel! X) I didn’t really take in the message or the significance at that point. Soon the music started and one of the first songs was a song called ‘Another in the fire’ by Hillsong the lyrics are:

There's a grace when the heart is under fire
Another way when the walls are closing in
And when I look at the space between
Where I used to be and this reckoning
I know I will never be alone
There was another in the fire
Standing next to me
There was another in the waters
Holding back the seas
And should I ever need reminding
Of how I've been set free
There is a cross that bears the burden
Where another died for me
There is another in the fire
By now I was starting to feel like this little ‘even if’ was gaining ground.  Then Priscilla Shirer, one of the speakers, talked about our God being the one who meets us in the fire.  All, of this was pushing into my psyche, God is powerful and even if….we will still face the furnace not giving into fear.
However, I had filled out a prayer card asking for prayer for Immi, for wisdom, discernment and for help to know how to keep ministering and working over this period ahead of us, but I had not asked for healing.  I just don’t think I had the faith at that point to expect it.  I have lived for quite a long period as the father in Mark 9 14-29, in fear of seizures, falls.  Three years ago Immi was thrown by a seizure 10 feet off a harbour wall into a foot of water – she was miraculously protected and only had a little scratch on her hand – but like the father in the story I have been saying to Jesus ‘I do believe, help me overcome my unbelief’ Mark 9:24.  One of the things I have been asking him for is a first-hand account of someone who has been medically, physically healed.  In my lack of faith a testimony of a subjective pain based illness wasn’t enough for me (I don’t think the pain is subjective but I needed it to be something measurable, definable, scientifically objective – I know, just call me Thomas!)  God wasn’t finished at this conference.

On the last day two ladies came forward, one was holding a massive bunch of cards, prayer requests and she had brought with her Jo Dunbar, an amazing lady who over the last year had faced terminal cancer.  She told her story and as I listened I could literally feel the faith rise in me.  The told of how she had been given a diagnosis of stage 4 cancer and all her consultants had said they were 99% sure that no treatment would be successful. She said that in the appointment room she had decided that she wasn’t going to let them speak death over her.  She started treatment and had a couple of rounds of chemo and the doctors were amazed as they could see it shrinking.  There was more to the story and I apologise if I have told it badly but the last part I can remember is that her oncologist phoned her in amazement telling her that she was looking at her scans and could see nothing. By this point I was in bits and as an aside, if Jo ever reads this post I want to thank you so much for sharing your story of faith and rescue. 

And this is where my challenge came.  If Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego can have faith to face the furnace and not give into fear, if God can rescue them from an impossible situation, if this lady, whose name I can’t even remember (so sorry!) can have faith for healing then so can I.

So, here is my challenge – I believe it is a challenge to me, but if you have the heart for this, if you are a pray-er, if you are a man or woman of faith and feel you can take on this challenge too, please pray with us:
I know he will meet us in the fire even if we have to go through it, but for Immi two days before the operation (which will be in the Autumn) she will have another MRI.  I want this MRI to be clear.  I want us to be able to say to her consultant before the MRI ‘there has been a significant drop in seizure activity’. And I want him to come back to us saying ‘We have done the MRI and the deterioration shown in the past MRIs has been reversed and we cannot see any evidence of Rasmussen’s Encephalitis any more.’

I know this is a biggy and I know, like the furnace, like the cancer, it is humanly incomprehensible but he saved them from being burned up, he healed the cancer, so I don't see why He can't do the same for Immi.   And like Shadrach, Meshach and Abed-nego will you say with us ‘I know our God walks through the fire with us, I know our God can rescue Immi from this illness and he will, but even if He does not we will not give into fear and despair for we know who holds the future.’

K x